How to Choose a Name For Baby - What to Name or Not Name Your Baby

The decision to name your baby is not only fun but a form of self-torture as well. The decision making process can initiate laughter, tears of sentiment, heated arguments and hurt feelings. But this seemingly fun task should not be taken lightly. the kid has to live with the name for the rest of his or her life. Sure, you can change your name but not until you are an adult and it isn't cheap. Often, a misnamed child acquires a nick-name and you might not like it.

Of course, you can go by the old standby and name the boy after his father. Then you wind up with Big Jim and Little Jim or Junior. Naming the child after a parent can also be so very unoriginal. Take my friend who comes from a family where they all have the same name. Francis, Frances, Joseph Francis, and Francis Joseph. It's like some weird club. After all, you'll;l already all have the same last name.

Naming a child after yourself can sound pretty darn egotistical. But it can also be a wonderful family tradition.

You can always name a a child after a grandparent or favorite relative. The problem here is that one relative will be proud a punch and love you forever (unless they hate their name) while the rest simmer with indignation and jealousy.

We solved this problem by naming our eldest son after both grandfathers. It was really nice. the middle name grandfather was dead so he didn't mind playing second fiddle and the living grandfather was very happy.

Maybe there ought to be one of those unwritten rules that says you can only name the baby after a dead relative like naming bridges after presidents.

Of course, you can play the bargaining game. All the kids will automatically have the father's last name so mom's family can be represented by first names. Or all the kids' middle names can be mom's former last name which I thought of for one son but didn't do (my parents had no sons) and now am kind of sorry but I bet he isn't.

Ever notice, when you look at a family tree, how many people all have the same name. In my family, it was Robert on both sides and not one of them a junior. Now, I really love the name Robert and dearly loved 2 of the Roberts personally, one I loved even though he died before I was born.  I so wanted to name a son Robert. But 3 of the 4 Roberts died terrible deaths - 2 of them way way too young. Maybe, I thought, let's give the name another chance. But maybe it would be carrying a curse.

The one Robert who didn't die horribly had the best death ever. At 80 years old, he was sitting in his white rocking chair, hale of health (til that moment), sound of mind, handsome, strong and kind. He asked his wife to gring him an RC Cola. She got up to fetch it and when she got back, he was dead. You think I digress. One Robert was crushed by a truck . Another Robert was hit by a train. So no Robert.

While perusing my family tree, I came upon some real interesting names. Fortunately for my children, I found the family tree after they were all named - though one unusual name comes pretty close to an unusual name way back.

But you get all warm and gooey. You think of all kinds of sentimental stuff. It's the hormones, honey. I wanted to name children Maxwell Aktenaten, Tecumseh, Edward Edward, and Trout Fishing in America.

 One of my ansesters was named Prime Iron. I kid you not. We couls have called David Prime Iron and boy, it would have fit him to a T. Even the obvious nick-name Rusty would have worked out fine. I bet he's glad that didn't happen.

When I was a girl, everybody was named Kathy, Linda, or Debbie. I never knew anybody named Zack or Alexander. Now, my youngest son knows oodles of kids with those names. There's a group of Alex's that hang out together. Weird.

In 2010 the top 10 names for boys were:

• Aiden

• Jacob

• Jackson

• Ethan

• Jayden

• Noah

• Logan

• Caden

• Lucas

• Liam

Top names for girls were:

• Sophia

• Isabella

• Olivia

• Emma

• Chloe

• Ava

• Lily

• Madison

• Addison

• Abigail
  

Number 7 on the boy's most popular name list was Logan. They are naming their sons after the Marvel Comic Book character Wolverine, a real nut in a cray yellow suit. Number 89, down from 2008's number 33 on the girl's list was Adriana after the New Joizey party girl murdered on the Sopranos.

Another thing that can be tough (or real helpful) is to be pregnant during the Olympics. Here you have a plethora of foreign and unusual names to choose from. I must admit to being rather partial to Vladislav one year but my husband did not approve.

Remember whatever you name the kid, he'll go through a phase when he'd like a different name. My sister once wanted to be called Tetedra. My youngest son recently wished we had named him Pierre.

Oh, and make sure you know how to pronounce the name. I know of a young lady called PA-ja-ma, actually spelled Pajamma and known to most normal people as a variety of sleep-wear.

Once, standing in line at a check out, the shoppers turned to one another and glowered. the line moved painfully slowly. It was like being in Purgatory. Ice cream began to melt. The cashier was inept, clumsy, stupid, and dull-eyed. When it finally was my turn, I looked up and saw her name tag : Tequilla. What were her parents thinking?

You could always resort to theme names. My husband's grandfather's people were all named after American generals. Unfortunately, they were all also famous American Indian killers, perpetrators of genocide. I didn't want to go there.

Greek mythology can be a unique source of names. My son's alternate names are Perseus, Theseus, and Bellerophon. They would have been so popular in school!

Saints names work well for lots of people - good sound names of good, moral people. Unfortunately, may saints were martyrs and died horrible deaths - burned at the stake, porcupined with arrows, beheaded.

Likewise, biblical names work well. the Bible was tons of cool names of admirable people. there's a lot of weird names as well, and too weird might not work well for your child. But, once again, fashion can turn a peculiar name into a popular one.

One evening in an empty hospital lobby (long story - everything turned out fine), I was sitting with one of my baby boys. He took his first steps that night, there at the hospital in the dimly lit lobby. An elderly nun walked up and we talked for awhile about family and things in general. When she met the baby, she asked his name.

Upon hearing his name, a look of kindness and peace crossed her wrinkled face. "He is specially blessed by God," she said.

Now, when mothers hear a thing like this, their gooshy, hormonal hearts melt. FI wondered what promted her to say that.

She looked at him and smiled. "Oh, it's his name," she said. "His name will draw God's love.